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Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Pride & Prejudice & Zombies


As many of you know from my post here, where Jane Austen felt my wrath, Pride and Prejudice made me want to run naked through a forest of broken glass, and then dive into a pool of salt water. Pain, I thought, might be what I needed to purge the damage that Lizzy and her dim witted sisters had done to my psyche. wasn't my favorite book.

Well, the other day I was wondering through the rough streets of Victoria (yeah, they can get rough), and I was accosted by a shirtless hobo who called himself Madrid. Amidst Madrid’s nonsensical ramblings, I noticed a copy of Pride & Prejudice & Zombies tucked into his shopping cart. I gestured, and through a drunken rant he explained that the zombie version of Austen’s book could make right all the harm caused by  the non-zombie version.

With such a promise, how could I refuse? 

So, after a brief struggle with what turned out to be a surprisingly fit hobo, I had the book. I asked politely to borrow his copy and he obliged.

Indeed this is the way Pride and Prejudice was meant to be enjoyed. How Jane Austen missed the fact that brain-eating zombies were needed to make her book a true masterpiece is beyond me. 

If you’re a fan of gore, and zombies who occasionally (or often) consume people’s brains, and if you have a massively twisted bit of a twisted sense of humor, this book is for you!

*Disclaimer: The events mentioned in the above book review, may, or may not, have happened exactly as they were described. Madrid, the shirtless hobo, might be a character in one of the books I'm writing, and there may, or may not, be such a thing as a forest made of glass. This is the blog of a professional liar, after all!*

8 comments:

Jade @ Chasing Empty Pavements said...

Oh I love this post!!! Made my day!

Sarah Pearson said...

My daughter brought this home from the school library (!) and I nabbed it off her. I love it :-)

Carrie Butler said...

Steve, you kill me. :) Sounds like a fun book!

Stina Lindenblatt said...

Thanks for the hiliarious review.

I happened to love the original novel, and zombies aren't my thing (unless they are hot looking zombie dudes), but I have heard this version is great.

Shell Flower said...

You are funny, Dude. I love, love, love Pride and Prejudice, but then zombies are pretty cool, too. I might just have to read this. Is Mr. Darcy still hot as a zombie?

Steven Whibley said...

Glad you liked the book review, guys.

Stina - good looking zombie dudes?? That just goes against everything I believe in when it comes to zombies. :)

Shell - Oh no, Darcy is no zombie, he's a zombie killer ... just like Elizabeth (she's a ninja killer too). You'd likely agree that being a zombie killer actually makes him hotter ... no?

Suzie Tullett said...

Despite what you say, I found this very engaging x

robinkristoff said...

This post was hysterical. :) I liked the original Pride & Prejudice, but I really had to be in the right mood to read it. I'll definitely have to check out this new take on it. Thanks!

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